coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
And the Sky Broke up (Legolas/Gimli | PG | 511 words) is Gimli's point of view during a storm. I, personally, love storms and to see one described so vividly is a treat. I also really like the Gimli characterization since too many fics have him bemoaning his lack of beauty when compared to Legolas. Not so here.

Excerpt:
When I woke in the dark it seemed to me that I still slept. I had turned in my sleep, so that I faced the open plain. The scene there was violent and strange. Lightning tore ragged seams from cloud to earth, its bright flashes illuminating a purple-grey sky. Water coursed down, more a fall of a flood than a fall of rain. The wind keened like a mother searching for a lost child, and, indeed, seemed to be seeking something, though what it sought I doubt any could say.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Overheard (Legolas/Gimli, OCs | R | 715 words) is a good humorous Legolas/Gimli piece. Two Lothloien elves hear something and decide to investigate. Then they stay because elves like to watch. They make a lot of the comments that I would like to make given the situation.

Excerpt:
"Listen. Do you hear it?" Fiolad asked.

Nildor heard faint growls and groans, interspersed with a hitching keening that was clearly of elven origin.

"What is that?" asked Nildor.

"I am not sure. I thought at first that it was lovers."

"It sounds more like a warg killing an elf!"
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Are You SURE You're Not Elvish? (ensemble | PG | 1,555 words) has the Pirates of the Caribbean crew ending up in Middle Earth. Everyone mixes up Legolas and Will. Very silly but a lot of fun too.

Excerpt:
"And he says he's not Legolas," Aragorn finished.

Gimli frowned. "Are you sure you're not Legolas with different hair?"

"Yes!" Will complained. "Why won't you people believe me?" He paused. "And why are you so short?"

"Dwarves often are," Gimli told him, deadpan. "Are you sure you're not elvish, then? Because you look very elvish."

"NO!"

"What about part elvish?"

"Why do people keep asking me that? For the last time, no!"

"I don't know, he looks pretty elvish to me," Merry said thoughtfully.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
They Say of Elves (Legolas/Gimli | PG13 | 1,654 words) is another Legolas/Gimli fic that deals with the differences between the two races. This story draws me in with the rhythm of the words. There's a poetry in it, offset with just the right touches of humor. Lovely, lovely Gimli voice. This entire story is utterly fantastic.

Excerpt:
You know what they say of the Elves, that they'll tumble you soon as look at you; seducers, coquettes, you'll wake with only a handful of leaves and a sweet taste in your mouth.

Well, I have traveled far and seen enough to give lie to many of the tales old Dwarf-dams tell in the mines of my youth. But still and all, I kept my eye on him. Legolas, a tall luminous shape in the edge of my vision; never far from me, a gleam of sunlight at my shoulder. And when the war was over, and he made good on his promise to travel with me, I knew what he was after. I thought I knew.

Durin's Beard, he wasn't subtle, was he? "Visit the tunnels and caverns of your people, Gimli, my friend," indeed. I just bet he was eager to visit my caverns. Elves are all the same.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Queer Eye for the Fandom Guy (ensemble | G | 1,016 words) has the Fab Five visiting eight different characters from fandom. This thing is full of fantastic one-liners, much like the show itself, and really nails the guys routine. But no, there are so many things that are laugh-out-loud funny in this. And it doesn't get old either.

Excerpt:
Subject three: Captain Jack Sparrow

CARSON: Okay, this is your normal everyday look? This isn't, like, terror drag?

JACK: Oh, this old thing. (Holds out the sleeves of his coat, tosses his hair.)

CARSON: Well, the good side is, you're not afraid to take chances. We can work with that.

TED: Come and take a look at the bar. We've tried to provide a little more variety, a little more finesse -- some top-brand vodka for mixers, a nice brandy --

JACK: Where is the rum?

TED: Rum -- you know, rum's nice in a pina colada or something like that, but it's a little downscale, and if you'll just consider --

JACK (pulls out musket): We'll be putting the rum back, mate.

TED: And the rum goes back.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Just a Thought (Elrond | G | 1,649 words) takes place during the Council of Elrond. It is one of the most hilarious things that I have ever read. There's an irreverence mixed in with a good imitation of Tolkien's style. Looking at that sentence, it sounds odd, but it really does work. And ha! Boromir's bit is too fantastic!

Excerpt:
For though he does not have the power of Galadriel, who can see deep into the minds of Elves and Men and all races alike, and who can speak directly to minds without words even though many miles separate the bodies -- and who, incidentally, uses this power at the most inconvenient times, like lunch-time and privy-time and this-really-isn't-the-time-time -- though Elrond does not share the Lady's power in equal measure, he has power of his own. For he is Elrond, son of Earendil, brother of the sire of kings (although sometimes he wishes Elros had thought better of that, particularly when Estel visits and they have to sprinkle ammonia in the passages to hide the smell), and when he gives people a special look, thinks really hard, and wiggles his eyebrows in a specific way, people are very impressed.</cite
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Like Father and Like Son (Gloin/Thranduil, Legolas/Gimli | R | 1,000 words) are two companion pieces, with Gloin and Thranduil musing on their sons' relationship. Though it's more about Gloin and Thranduil's relationship. Not a happy ending-- no ending at all since, really, life doesn't have an ending-- just reflections on times past. Very touching.

Excerpt:
Legolas is honorable--according to my son--and he seems truly to care for Gimli. When he hurts Gimli--he will, he's an elf--it will not be intentional. Will that comfort Gimli? Legolas may regret hurting him, may even grieve as he rips my son's heart out and walks away, but he'll still rip, he'll still walk.

An elf came to my cell, eighty years ago. He didn't know my name then and I pray he still doesn't. It was a long time ago and I've grown older--even if he hasn't--and all dwarves look the same, don't they? Short and stunted, hairy and unlovely. *He* told me that, after all.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Washing Instructions for Hobbits (hobbits | G | 439 words) is adorably funny. It's strange, yes, but enjoyable.

Excerpt:
You may wish to add hobbit softener to your load in the dryer. Hobbit softener helps to control hobbit cling. There's nothing worse than searching all over the house for a lost hobbit, only to find it stuck to your back or leg with static electricity (well almost nothing because some people actually contrive for this to happen).
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
The Rose and the Thistle (Legolas/Gimli | PG | 4,945 words) has Gimli deciding to court Legolas. Legolas, being unfamiliar with Dwarven customs, has no clue what Gimli's doing. I love this story for the way Gimli is written. All too often, writers have him moaning and groaning about how short and hairy and ugly he is and Legolas could never find him attractive. This always strikes me as the author forcing their own value judgement onto Gimli; it should be just as bizarre that he finds Legolas attractive as Legolas finding him attractive. Arctapus' Gimli is, instead, proud and dignified. When he finds himself in love with Legolas, he decides to court Legolas rather than spend endless hours thinking of how impossible a relationship is. And I jump for joy that someone else sees Gimli like I do.

Excerpt:
He stared backward, leaning his arm on his ax and considered the blond beauty that had captured his heart so completely and unexpectedly. He was taller to the point of absurdity. He was beautiful in a way that dwarves weren't. Yet, he was aware that among his own kind he was considered handsome and very desirable. He was strong and virile, brave, masculine and tough. All the qualities that made his people so strong, enduring and talented, Gimli had in abundance.

No one could match him for rock hard endurance. He was smart and agile, tart tongued and brave. He was loyal to his friends and implacable to his enemies. He had no real clear cut memory of the moment when Legolas moved from enemy to friend, but it had happened and now he sat, considering the warmth the elf's mere presence gave to him and what it might mean in the long run.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
The Story Teller (Legolas/Gimli | PG13 | 1,508 words) gives a different ending to Legolas and Gimli's story than the one Tolkien gives, and it's a sad one. Qualli prefaces the story with a note that it was orginally told orally, and I can tell while reading it. The words wash over me and soothe me; I can hear the words being spoken in this story more than in anything else I've read. And it's a lovely feeling.

Excerpt:
It began in the land near the Glittering Caves, for that is how all the Dwarves mark such things, to the nearest of their dwellings. And it was in the years directly following the Quest of the Fellowship, for that is how all the creatures of Middle Earth marked the years, after that fateful event.

In the Glittering Caves, In the years following the Quest, there lived an Elf, and a Dwarf. They lived sometimes in the caves, and sometimes in the nearby settlement of the Elves. Often they traveled together, through all the woods, and valleys, and mountains.
coprime_recs: Chouji and Shikamaru on a roof cloud-watching (Default)
Cultural Difference - If Thou Kiss Not Me (Legolas/Gimli | NC17 | 4,816 words) is a Legolas/Gimli fic exploring the (potential) differences between elf and dwarf cultures and what that means for these two. It's a light-hearted story that makes me smile every time I read it. I feel sorry for everyone who has to be around Legolas and Gimli; the two are rather, er, impassioned.

Excerpt:
"Elves don't kiss, Gimli." Aragorn said after the dwarf finally swallowed his pride. Legolas was out scouting and rounding up some dinner for the trio.

"They don't?" Gimli scratched his head, surprised. That hadn't occurred to him. "Ye mean Arwen doesn't kiss ye?"

Aragorn stopped sharpening his sword a moment and got a far away, almost sad look. "Not at first, but she took to it once I persuaded her. It's just not something that elves do with each other. One might kiss another in a gesture of blessing but not as lover's kiss, mouth to mouth as other folk do."